too lazy to masturbate can you do it for me
I can’t believe this is what our president and vice president spend their time on. We’re in 15 trillion dollars of debt, and millions of people are homeless, and abortion is still legal, and instead of signing bills to fix these things our president is doing this. Well I’m glad you’re having fun, you fucking bitch. Fuck the United States. /rant
WAITNDO YOU THINK THISNIS A REAL THING????
THIS IS SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE OH MY GOD
THIS IS THE BEST POST EVER I’M CRYING
my brother told me to design a poster for his student council campaign
he won the election and is now student council president
I think I stumbled on the Internet’s greatest Yelp review.
BOND is a tiny touch module. It can be a pendant or a bracelet but it comes in pairs. You keep one and you give one to a friend. When you touch it, your friend feels it. No matter where they are on the planet. We don’t do tweets, we do tickles.
gonna put it on my dick
THAT IS NOT THE INTENDED USE SIR
This is actually so cool because some people wear bracelets and necklaces and things as comfort items. I used to wear a necklace from my grandma to remind me of her and I would touch the pendant on it when I was feeling down or stressed. So imagine (if she were still alive), every time I did that she would know I was thinking of her, drawing strength from her.
And then imagine poking it and the other person feels it and pokes back and you end up in a real life facebook poke war.
I would send messages in morse code
magine you and your best friend have one. When the friend dies, he/she is buried with the bracelet. A couple weeks later, you feel someone touch your wrist.
Well this escalated from cool tech to perverted hilarity to something heartfelt then finally something out a creepypasta
someone told me i had a dry sense of humour and i said “oh does it need watering”
my french teacher kept looking at me like this so I took this without warning him and told him he’d be famous
he demanded a retake bc he wanted u guys to think hes cool
I can’t believe I forgot to mention the fact that when I took this he told me to photoshop some hair on so “my internet friends” would like him
someone make this mans dreams come true
WHEN I SHOWED HIM THIS HE SAID “THATS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED”